Happy Valentine’s Day! It was a lovey-dovey week on GR this past seven, as the trio of marquee stories we have for you were all Valentine’s themed… in one way or another.
Top 7… ways games lie to you about love
There are probably hundreds of these you could come up with for the entertainment industry in general, but this particular article by Ashley Reed is all about everyday dating and love themes that have made their way into our favorite hobby, but in completely ridiculous ways. Most of the stuff mentioned here is just really bad advise when grafted onto the real world.
Sure, in a game it might be okay to flirt with just about every character you come across and hit on people when they’re at their lowest point (wait, is that okay even in a game?), but in the actual, physical world this stuff is just going to make you look like a jerk.
Click here and see what not to do when it comes to romance, unless you’re playing a game of course.
The 12 most uncomfortably sexy video game animals
Yeah… this one’s exactly as the title implies- incredibly uncomfortable. Some of what’s pictured here doesn’t make all that much sense to me personally (Lopunny?), but quite a few of them are obviously way overdone in terms of animal magnetism.
Of the characters referenced here, game stars like Berry (from Conker) and Q-Bee from Darkstalkers are pretty obvious inclusions (still a little disturbing, but obvious), but Hans the Fox from Bloody Roar was one that surprised me. And that’s mainly because I totally forget he even existed, and there are a few like that here. Also, they’re almost all disturbing… did I say that already?
Click through for a little Valentine’s fun. Or something.
10 Most cringeworthy video game sex scenes
And here, of course, is the grandaddy of all Valentine’s-related gaming storers. Those sex scenes that we all dread playing just as someone else enters the room. Seriously, what is it with that? Like, every time one comes on, somebody who doesn’t play games walks in. Then you have to fill in with the classic ‘no, this game isn’t all about sex!’ line.
Anyway, here you’ll find the most cringe-inducing sexy-time simulations ever. From the Mass Effect and Dragon Age games, to titles like Killer is Dead and pretty much every game that David Cage has ever made, almost very one you could think of is present and accounted for.
Oh, and this is ever so slightly NSFW, just keep that in mind before you click.